Sandra R.

Zürich, Switzerland

a life with joy!

„Sandra, you’re always such a pessimist.“

This statement by a friend caught me off guard and really hit a weak spot. It was true, I showed tendencies to only see risks and problems. But that surely was only my realistic view of things. There has to be someone who points out if something simply won’t work, doesn’t there?

But in a way, my friend was probably right. Years before, I had already decided that life just isn’t fit for me. I felt like I simply don’t belong here and didn’t really want my life. In these years, I would have been happy as ever to just give it to someone else and pass on. But that was the past, wasn’t it?

I grew up in a Christian family. Going to church every Sunday was a weekly routine and I enjoyed going. Already as a child, I realized that this God truly exists and Jesus is more than just a fairytale figure. As early as the age of ten I could read the Bible and its verses actually appealed to me.

However, as time passed on, I began to ask myself, what I am even on this planet for. I was taught that God has a good plan for my life, but I just couldn’t believe that anymore. Everything just seemed dull and purposeless for me. It was the time when I often wished I would die.

Incredibly enough, I often ended up at the same verse, each time I opened my Bible:

Psalm 16, 11: You will show me the path of life; in your presence is fullness of joy; at your right hand are pleasures forevermore.

During the same time, many Christians approached with similar verses (“My time is in your hands”). Gradually, I learned to accept the meaning of these verses and decided to live my life.

But in this moment my friend uttered that sentence to me, I understood that I very much lived, but my thoughts were still heavily influenced from my previous experiences. I wanted to live, but I still was under the impression that the whole deal – life – just wasn’t my thing. Should this really continue like this?

I started to ask God for joy. Simultaneously a friend helped me by reminding me, each time I would begin to speak negatively. By and by, I began to speak with a more positive attitude. It wasn’t always my true conviction, but through speaking positively, my thoughts slowly started to change. The phases when I felt really bad came more seldom and grew shorter. If I realized that something was not well, I prayed or read in the Bible. At the latest in the next morning, I was fine again.

Today, after a few years, I experience a deep, inexplicable joy. My life is great! Even if there are some hardships at times, I can enjoy my life. No matter the circumstances. Now, the second phrase of the above quoted verse has a deeper meaning:

Psalm 16, 11: You will show me the path of life; in your presence is fullness of joy; at your right hand are pleasures forevermore.

“In your presence” – I cannot achieve that presence through my own will and actions, but it is there I found and find joy. I am aware that there can be (and sometimes there is) a change in the perception of that joy, but now I know, where I will find help: In the presence of God! He will give me joy! And everything else that I need.

If you have questions, experienced something similar or wish to experience something the like, I would be happy to receive a message from you.

If you like to know more about God, have a look at the video below about Jesus. Trust me, a life with him is worth it in any case! And you’ll get the joy for free! J

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