Bad Start!

My mother was not a very happy person. She considered suicide several times and tried once before I was born. When she learnt that she was pregnant with me due to an affair with a married man it did not make life easier. Her deep longing to be loved led her into a series of unhealthy relationships that brought a lot of pain into our little family. Some of the men who lived with us were very violent and aggressive, permanently causing strive and arguments.

God’s peace

Praise God for my grandma. She lived in a different city but regularly came to visit. At a very early age she introduced me to God and taught me about the importance of committing your life to Jesus. She looked back on a series of painful relationships herself and became a Christian on a graveyard’s bench after talking to two nuns in the 1950's. Whenever she came to visit us she would bring tapes, books, devotionals, whatever she could find in the Christian bookstore to teach me about God. In those years I got to know Jesus in a very intimate way and whenever hell broke loose in our house I could sense his peace and love.

Can I really trust him with my life?

I could have never denied God but when I was in my late teens I was not so sure anymore if Jesus was able to satisfy my desire for a life full of meaning and adventure. That was what I was yearning for. In those days I thought I could get the ultimate thrill out of sports and a series of relationships of which I knew that they actually would not lead anywhere and partly where very unhealthy. My life's strategy as much as I had one did not really work. My longing was still there and I knew that something had to change. I wrote a letter to God that sounded somehow like this:

“God I don’t want to live a boring life. I read in the Bible how fulfilling and meaningful the first Christians lived their lives. They found peace in you, you sent them to heal the sick and to change the world, you provided supernaturally for their needs asked them to share with all nations what you have done at the cross – if a life like that is still possible today I want to commit myself fully to you.”

Whoever puts his trust in God will not be disappointed

A voice deep down inside of me told me that I should trust the God of my childhood, although it meant to make a series of difficult decisions. I had to quit a relationship, disappoint some of my relatives and take steps into unknown territory. That is how twenty years ago I entered into a completely new season in life. I visited a Bible College, studied to become a teacher and earned my degree in theology. 2006 I started a missions organization and a Bible school that is committed to sending teams of young people to preach the gospel around the globe. I have experienced miracles in my own life and in the life of others. Physical and emotional healings were among them. Whereever people hear the gospel they are filled with new hope.

Thankfulness

I am so thankful for everything that God has done in my life. To trust Him was the best decision I have ever made. He has changed my life, though I still have to be careful not to slip back into patterns that wrongly shaped me during my childhood years. He has given me a wonderful wife, three beautiful children and has made my life new. With all my heart I desire that you make the same experience: God is good!

P.S.

In 1998 my mother was diagnosed with cancer, but it was also the moment when she committed her life to God. Though her physical situation deteriorated every day Jesus wiped away a lifetime of pain and emotional misery. She became a truly happy woman. Finally she also found her peace with God and received grace and forgiveness.

This is my story.