My Relationship with God
Hello! My name is Caeli, and I am from a small town called Steubenville in Ohio of the United States. And this is the story of when I encountered God for the very first time. I was born and raised Catholic. I come from a devout Catholic family. Ever since I was little, I have had great Christian people around me who have shown me the reality of God and shown me how important it is to have a relationship with Him.
When I was 14, I went on a retreat (which is a weekend away where you learn about God, you study, and you work on your relationship with Him). I was very excited for this retreat, because I saw people around me who had relationships with God. They were so joyful and peaceful because of it, and I wanted that for myself. I wanted to know God too. However, I was afraid that God would not be as amazing as everyone was saying, and if He was such an amazing, all-powerful God, then why would He want a relationship with me? I felt that I was too insignificant for Him to notice me or want to know me. So, rather than being dissapointed or rejected by Him, I closed myself off and built a wall against Him.
Further into the weekend, I realized that if I did not try to know God, then I would never know if He was everything that people talked about, but still I was afraid. Finally, I gathered the courage to let down my wall and open myself up to Him. I let myself fall, and I prayed that He would catch me. And He did. I felt His overwhelming presence for the first time. In that moment, I had no thoughts of the world, of my family or friends, or of all the things I needed to get done. It was just me and God. Alone. I felt His deep love for me. I felt His joy and His peace. He was everything everyone had talked about and more, and I thought, this must be what heaven is like.
After that weekend, I made Christ the focus and center of my life. I was sure to pray daily and keep up my relationship with Him. It is not always easy, and I do not always have the energy to pray. And although I do not understand why He allows certain things to happen, I know that I can trust Him. And sometimes when I find myself unable to trust Him, I remind myself of the very first time I trusted Him, when He came through. When I struggle, I know that no matter what, I can trust Him.
Have you ever felt insignificant in the eyes if God? Have you ever been afraid of being rejected or dissappointed by Him? Have you ever been unable to trust Him? I have! If you would ever like to chat, please contact me! I would love to talk to and get to know you ?