Fear of losing what is dearest to me...
"Sleep well!" - and the door is shut. I'm standing alone in my flat, staring at the inside of the main door, listening to the sound of the footsteps of my fiancé fading in the staircase. I feel that unpleasant feeling creeping over me again. What if something happens to him on his way home? Tears well up in my eyes. I sit down on my bed and the fear of losing what is dearest to me overwhelms me.
when bad things happen in life
A couple of months ago the father of my fiancé died of a tumour that came very suddenly and aggressively. A few weeks later I started to be terribly afraid, that my own man would be taken from me. My future, that I had been looking forward to with him would be gone. Maybe we would have children who then would have to grow up without a father. Under such circumstances would I even want children? What am I really building my future on? What can give me peace to be able to live on normally?
My way out of fear
In these questions and fears I experienced God. I read in the bible, that he has the power to decide over life and death. God showed me that I can find peace if I live my life with him. I realised how important it is to trust him with each and every situation in my life. I talked to Jesus, who sacrificed his life for me, about my feelings and fears and experienced his profound peace inside of me.
The fears aren't completely gone. I still often think about how I would cope in hard situations. But when I think of them now, I know with all my heart, that my Lord Jesus will be in them with me.
what are you afraid of?
Maybe you have similar feelings in certain situations in your life? Is there fear and anxiety in your life which you feel you can't manage on your own? What security do you build your future on? Write to me. I would love to hear your story!