From darkness into light.
Darkness was typical for my life for many years.
It started with being bullied, always being physically ill including the associated pains. As a little girl I was already tormented by the spiritual world, day and night. There was never a moment of peace .. Add in violent relationships and wrong choices, and the circle is complete. Despite everything, I always had an indestructible hope deep inside me, perhaps invisible to the world, but I cherished this one. Spirituality had my interest, but I never made it beyond the occult. Mentally ill periods followed. For a while, misery put me on the wrong track and many nights passed by without sleep. Then it all went downhill, and to make it even worse, I was dying ..
I survived a torn aorta and when I was a few minutes without a heartbeat, God called me by name and I came back into my body. Unfortunately, I was told by doctors that an incurable, life-limiting illness was the cause and this was not easy to accept. Nevertheless something gave me the strength to go on. There were some special moments, in which I realized that there really must be a God. I literally felt that He shook me up to awaken me. But the real touch came later when again I had to fight for my life for a period in the hospital. I cried out to Him, "If you really exist, come get me now or heal me! I cannot do this any longer! "
Well, He made Himself known. Throughout the following year He showed in everything noticeable that He was there. Many dreams I had for life, I was able to fulfill. He spoke audibly: "you think you worship Me when you practice yoga, but that's not Me.." I was so startled I stopped acutely. I found a psalm online at a poetry page:. "Of all the days of my life, none was missing. "That one hit me straight in the heart! During the same period, there was a show on television called Searching for God. I watched it and discovered that Jesus not only died on the cross, but also ressurected and is alive as we speak! This truth hit like a bomb, could this be it, could He really be the Truth? The icing on the cake was the Bible that was delivered, addressed to me. Exactly on the day I was in the car, disgusted with myself, ready to quit life. God intervened! For good!
I read the Bible, and it was like a bright light that entered me so hard that the walls that I had built up over the years crumbled down, and God's love penetrated my heart. An overwhelming sense of grace made the reality well up in me that I really had come home, that my Lord had found me, and from now on I would be safe. Suddenly I realized that the silent hope that I cherished, was Jesus who always fought for my life! From that day my life has not been the same. I left my old life behind me, He has transformed me. I got baptized, moved to partake in a Bible school and then went into the mission field directly. In many countries, I have been able to serve and even lived for a long amount of time. There is nothing more beautiful than doing the will of our Father under the guidance of Holy Spirit and see miracles happen.My life is now marked by hope, faith and love.
Now my life is characterised by light.
Literally. Every day I thank God for the great miracle that I can live life with Him, and see many lifes transform because He works through me. He has turned my sorrow into dancing. And even more, I know have a worldwide spiritual family.With God nothing is impossible!
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